Sunday, November 20, 2011

"scare crow"


windswept dreams chased into a corner,
darkness engulfing each and every inch of solace
each and every piece of sanity
limp, wet, with yesterday's blood, sweat and tears
it doesn't matter now
because nobody cares

in between a dream, a rock and a hard place
lies the moment of clarity
the idea that reality could be so much better than what you've been given
stacked, rhymed, reasoned and forgiven
this life wasn't meant to be lived
it was meant to be felt, challenged and breathed into a soul
a soul without refuge in a body and a mind
holding it hostage
a soul, intricate and held together with the threads of hope
the ability to nurture, grow and cope

channels flip back and forth across static into the heavens of
eternal endlessness and
blank canvas becomes stained with mental hues, that align
and infuse
this shit could be something
it could really be something
but even in the seconds that begins to unfold
and time tells a story that was already told
it stings and burns with the religious burden of faith
when more suffering lies ahead

a head
filled and stuffed with straw
perched in a field of corn, hung high on a four way
but a puppet to scare the crows, you willing scarecrow
the crows who pick and pull you from your wits
you've come undone now
your senses are blowing into the sky

Monday, September 12, 2011

a lover's words

I caught her dream there, nestled between fingertips brushing strands of hair from moments of deep thoughts perspiration

A smile rather than words to emit a feeling unspoken to deceive a worried lover's hesitation, with eyes that seemed to search beyond their locked gaze

It's been dangling on the edge of her lips like an old cigarette...stale, yellow & stained with a second fix of an emotion's addiction, not yet ready to confront

A destiny's design fraught with uncertainty in love & life
So we lay, still in the darkness hands & bodies searching for a deeper meaning within one another

It's cold & unfriendly in the world beyond these 4 walls, caged security stifling our ability to grow, our desire to know
A life in which we've only seen asleep or on tv, reality more of a nightmare-ish dream

Hands intertwined, clasped, holding firm until slumber takes her away from me
Fingers slipping away until they merely rest against my skin
Moonlight illuminates the innocence in her sleepy face
I run my thoughts across her cheeks, kiss the tears that fall unbeknownst to her mind awake behind closed eyes
I fear the morning will greet us with promise, yet she will only see wasted time, wasted lines between a lover's words & the distance grows closer on the horizon
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Tuesday, August 2, 2011

[emotional affair]

defined
a relationship between a person and someone other than (their) spouse (or lover) that has an impact on the level of intimacy, emotional distance and overall dynamic balance in the marriage. The role of an affair is to create emotional distance in the marriage
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Thursday, June 2, 2011

Blue.bleeds.red


Caught between a fistful of dollars & a dream,
a scream
I'm laced in obscurity, my potential transparent against
the pale reform of democracy

They say “Just let it be” but it's hard to let go
when letting go means, giving up my identity

Strapped with an armor of adversity's finest steel
Letters that become words that attack & verbally annihilate
dumb it down: fatality; kill
I'm too dark to shoot back ignorance
I'm too defined to let it break my will

Caution isn't thrown to the wind, it blows there
when your skin feels the landing of its touch
its never enough
even when you feel as if your soul is
sandpaper rough
they want more

Brown bleeds blue like pink bleeds too
and tears that fall scar wounds that don't heal
fresh, raw and constantly entered by the eyes
by the tongues
of said chosen ones
violating my person, my being, feeling dirty
as if a part of them
will now remain a part of me
some way, some how
I've got to get clean
Those racists left their filth on me.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

.beautifully flawed.

broken, chipped, dipped and lyrically sipped
your soul was like one fine line after another
placed before my eyes, hungry for meaning, purpose
depth

i walked in thinking i was going right,
when everything was really just left

stepped
into your heart gently
walking on the eggshells of your broken hope
tiptoeing past the remnants of your bitter past
i fell in love there

and i've loved you ever since

Thursday, April 14, 2011

This heart...

This heart is inexplicably devoid of the saturation of human lust, trust
If loins, not love, could penetrate my chambers instead of gut wrenching romance
This dance between lovers limbs, whims, brights and dims, could lead me through the dark
And find the way back to me again
Save face from the hurt and pain again
Damn this tangled mess of emotional threads, hanging overhead, like a beaten cloud ready to bend
Bend, pour and flood even more
The sweet turns sour and you can't remember that good feeling before
Chance turns to fate and repeat offenders continue to commit crimes, spit lines, and nestle in the confines
Of your wilting soul, heart decayed, rotting, stinking for the world to see displayed
The end was the beginning if the first time is already the last
And if you want to know the truth of the matter, there's no one left to ask
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Monday, April 11, 2011

I'm awake

I'm awake with the morning sun, the birds and the sky
But inside I sleep in the restlessness of my troubled soul
The earth pulled beneath my feet, my cries a soft moan amidst voices in the crowd
I'm here but I don't really exist anymore
My heart beats but doesn't keep me alive
The thunder of my feelings roars and breaks through the morning blue
Rain falls gently then faster upon my face
This is the storm I've been waiting to create
Others scramble for cover but I stand still, soaked in my own reproach
Silenced by my own tongue, my own emotions, my own doing
I'm unraveling thread by thread
I'm falling away from me
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Friday, March 4, 2011

You make me...

You make me wish I could turn back the hands of time.
Leave you before you never were mine,
Reflect ahead instead of wasting time, realize the debt in emotional lies.
You make me want to grab my heart so it won't beat, blacken my lungs so I can't breathe, release your grip so I can be free.
You make me want to turn night into day, turn blue into grey, wish tomorrow was today, throw my feelings away.
You make me not want to be me.

I hate this.
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Monday, January 10, 2011

She doesn't

She doesn't feel my love anymore, doesn't carry it on her back like the wings that used to pull her across the sky and into my arms, away from anyone and anything that hurt her.

She doesn't feel my love anymore, doesn't miss the pressing of our lips, wanting, wet and hungry with the desire of new lovers intimacy. They crumble, dry to a finger's touch...nothing is more than enough.

She doesn't feel my love anymore, doesn't look into my eyes or let me see through hers, into her soul anymore. The light is gone, left with a small pile of dying embers trying to remember how their flames once could burn love into the coldest heart.

It's dark here now...
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